Tuesday, May 10, 2011


I REALLY HATE TO ADMIT THIS, but I am slowly assimilating.

EXAMPLE:  Like yesterday, when I was shopping at Føtex, as I was approaching a register, I had noticed an elderly lady walking towards it.  My jet gears kicked in, and I turned from a sweet Mrs. Jekyll to an ugly Mrs. Hyde.  Aggressive.  Violent.  Register starved.  I forced her cart to the side, mentally yelling, "SHE WHO HESITATES, MASTURBATES", earning my right before her and the other walking zombies who we call farmor, mormor, bedstemor, granny, grandma, etc...   


I walked out of that expensive store with my head held up high and strutting like a male cock.

A few years ago, I would have been appalled when this would happen to me.  I would feel like a cheap immigrant dog when I would be rudely told, "TIL VENSTRE OG TIL HØJRE?" (TO THE LEFT OR TO THE RIGHT?) or "FLYTTE DIG!" (MOVE AWAY!) or just rudely shoved to the side.

Not anymore baby!  WHEN IN ROME, right?

Will this aggressive behavior be used when I'm visiting family in the U.S.?  Will I be reminded by my son again that I am not a raping wanna-be viking?

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